Pro-Procrastination


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Follow up post: Toy Story Costumes

Earlier I wrote about some of the Toy Story costumes I’ve seen throughout the ages, so here’s a fluff follow-up post. Toy Story 3 was a big deal, so obviously we had to go to the midnight showing in costume. In an effort to make sure that none of the fringe characters felt left out, I dressed up as Pterodactdoll that Sid made with his sister’s Sally doll and a dinosaur head.

The resemblance is uncanny. 
Above, I give you Rex, Hamm and Slinky Dog. 
And here is Barbie, a waaaay less creepy Hamm, and a toy soldier. 
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Two Things. Also, spoilers.

1. Hey! So it’s winter break, which means that when I’m not sleeping 10 hours a night and listening to Michael Buble’s Christmas album, I’m unearthing diamonds in the rough like this guy (or woman.. ah?!!?):

I AM MRS. NESBITT!

NO WORDS! Coming from someone who has dressed up as Toy Story characters/ props several times (once as the pterodactyl doll from Andy’s room, once as the bowl of Fruit Loops Woody dunks his head into.. don’t worry, I’m looking for the pictures) , I can only say that I have nothing but rock solid admiration and love for this man, who has pulled off the world’s greatest Toy Story costume I’ve ever seen.

2. Also, Grey’s Anatomy remains the single most impressively jaw-dropping teledrama I have ever laid eyes on. I know it sucks when people talk nonstop about TV shows.. but I can’t help it. This show has broken about ten million glass ceilings on what is okay to show on television and how much human suffering viewers are capable of withstanding before taking their eyes out with an ice cream scoop (which is essentially what I would have to do if I wanted to stop watching this show). For example :

The one where Izzy goes crazy and cuts her fiance’s LVAD wire, then spends like week in the bathroom in her prom dress when he dies anyway, then has hallucinations for a year. 
The one where someone shoots McDreamy IN THE HEART.
The episode where two people were impaled with the same pole. Actually. And they were facing each other, so one had to watch the other die as he got pulled off.
Mediocre medical teledramas might draw the line at Stephen King-esque hallucinations or double impalements, but Grey’s Anatomy spares no expense. NO EXPENSE. Which is how they got to episode 18 of season 7 .. the Musical. 

It’s not enough that Dr. Callie Torres and her baby (Dr. Sloane’s baby!)  are about ten minutes away from dying, but everyone has to be singing The Fray’s “How to Save A Life” while they are literally failing to save her life. I don’t know whose idea this was, but I’m making it my duty to:

Step One – Find out who and tell them we need to talk.
Step Two – Say ‘Sit down, it’s just a talk.”
Step Three – Punch them in the face for letting Ellen Pompeo sing at all. Not even The Fray deserves that sort of suffering.. please.
Step Four – Sign over my soul in gratitude for allowing Dr. Sloane to sing a whole half a verse, which I have engraved into my heart for time and all eternity.  I have fallen in love with Mark Sloane about sixty times during this show, and “Let him know that you know best, cause after all you do know best,” makes this the 61st time.


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List of Thoughts I Am Too Lazy To Make Into A Real Post

1. My dad and I got to see Andrea Ledesma in Munich! She and Jörg took the two-hour train from Neumarkt and spent Sunday eating white sausage and seeing impressionist paintings and drinking German punch with us. I tell you this so that you will think we are classy and cultured, when really the opposite is true because my dad and I spent Monday night watching Friends in German. Really it was just me watching Friends with a German phrasebook in hand trying to see what the laughtrack was laughing at while my dad was Skyp(e?)ing with my mom. Other notes about the trip..

–  ABSURDLY expensive internet ($6 euro per hour. PER HOUR!)
– ABSURDLY amazing Michael Jackson altar randomly sitting there on a street. I mean there is some seriously heartfelt fandom going on in Munich. 

The king of Bavaria is no match for the king of pop. 
MJ = Just another part of Munich. 
Speaking of Michael Jackson, this video does a pretty good job of showing exactly what I look like 90% of the time I’m in the kitchen. 

2. The latest Modern Family episode confirmed yet again that Cameron Tucker and I are the exact same person. Exactly. It is mildly terrifying. Even though I’m sure that none of you are in the least bit interested by the freakish similarities between me and TV’s most loveable gay dad, I am taking notes to dedicate a whole post (with actual sentence structure) to this. The jist of it will probably be something along the lines of: Paulina Lopez and Cameron Tucker: Hypersensitive, passive aggressive, believe “the more you spend the more you save,” invest way too much meaning on random events and cry for hours when others do not remember dozens upon dozens of these tiny but meaningful moments, own too many shirts, have an unhealthy relationship with food, etc.  Stay tuned.


3.  Why yes, I did see The Muppet Movie in theatres. Twice. I wouldn’t want to see it a third time because everything about Walter makes me want to punch him in the face. Everything about Kermit makes me want to punch him in the face, too. It’s the same feeling I got from Mickey Mouse, or Tommy from the Rugrats/All Grown Up, or Little Foot from The Land Before Time. There’s something about these characters that makes me feel like I’m being conned.

4. I tried making a list of the top five worst Christmas songs, but all I could come up was Christmas with Weezer, the Christmas album my sister keeps playing around the house.

 I’m into celebrity Christmas albums as much as the next person, but whoever thought that a rock version of O Come All Ye Faithful and O Holy Night would be a good idea is doing the world a disservice.

5. I was going to write something about Herman Cain and Pokemon, but these guys say it best. Needless to say, I was crossing my fingers that he’d quote the ancient prophecy with the clever plot-twisting “ash” pun.


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Postcards from Paulina

This was originally going to be a post about traveling in Munich with my dad (see the clever title I came up with?!), but like so many other times during this trip, plans have changed.

Obviously, if I wanted to write a post about my really interesting and educational travels, I needed to stand on the shoulders of giants by seeing how Buster writes his travel blog. So I went to Postcards From Buster and was browsing through some of his posts when I came across a little place called.. GUANAJUATO, MEXICO YEAAAAAHBUDDY!
 <-  Just a completely real, totally not fake picture Buster took. Here’s what he had to say about the most beautiful place on earth
The coolest part of this post was reading that Buster met a mime named Sigfrido, which is remarkably similar to Sigifredo (Yes, Ernesto). 
In conclusion, PBS knows where it’s at. Also in conclusion, Buster and I are basically the same person because we are both traveling with our dads and we use the exact same angle when photographing the Basilica de Nuestra Señora de Guanajuato. 


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Danke Schoen

If you are like me, you spent no less than an entire hour verifying that Wayne Newton, the person who sings “Danke Schoen” is actually a MAN. Just listen to that voice, that is not a man’s voice. Only it is. This is really similar to the way I was convinced for months/years that Adele and Duffy were black, only to find out I was very wrong. The moral of the story, I guess, is not to judge a singer by the very convincing qualities of their voice. The other point of the story is that I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned “Danke Schoen” at least five times in this blog, and I want this post to spend a little bit more than six words talking about what the song is about.
 

1. I’m thankful for the journals that have been piling up in my room since I was 6 that let me travel back in time and allow me to be simultaneously embarrassed and entertained. Sometimes, I feel good knowing that I’ve grown a lot since 5th grade. Most of the time, I just see that most things have stayed the same. Ten years ago, for instance, I STILL 1) never knew what date it was, 2) used too many exclamation points, 4) made everything into lists / bad poems, 5) wrote too much about food and TV, and 6) had terrible cursive. It would be a lot of fun to make this post into a list-poem for old times’ sake, but I’m already up past my bedtime and I don’t think I could come up with something meaningful for V that isn’t velcro (… Vinny Guadagnino?). Anyway, I’m thankful for my mom, who gave me my first journal (a bunch of colored index cards) and told me to write. 
2. This is sort of a cop-out because it’s an extension of number 1, but I’m thankful for National Novel Writing Month. A month ago, I told myself to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days, and that novel is officially finished as of Nov. 30, 2011. It’s a terrible novel that probably needs 30 months of editing, there are plot holes and continuity errors all over the place, random lists of Crayola colors and magical candles, and a couple of characters with no first name because I’d run out of good ones, but according to the creators of National Novel Writing Month, it’s a capital N Novel and I am so happy. I couldn’t have done this without the teachers who taught me what it meant to write and what it meant to love it, particularly Mrs. Barbara Bonday in 2nd grade, Dr. Rebecca Koelln in 10th grade and Prof. Greg Smith in my third year of college. And (duh) I’m thankful for a very patient and understanding husband who encouraged me the entire time, and was willing to put up with late dinners, leftovers and a lot of Basil’s pizza while I typed away. 
3. I can’t tell you enough how thankful I am for Christmas music, and that it’s finally socially accepable to listen to it all I want. ALL I WANT. (yes, Ernesto). Panino and I grew up listening to a “Frosty The Snowman” album that taught us Jolly Old Saint Nicholas and Up On the House and ten other essential songs. I love that there are entire radio stations dedicated to Christmas music, I love that there is a Christmas song for every occasion, I love that Celine Dion recorded O Holy Night, I love watching Love Actually just so I can sing along, I love that there are about 10 bajillion Christmas-related excuses to listen to Christmas music (baking cookies, decorating the tree, cooking a huge meal, washing the dishes after eating a huge meal, ice skating, Christmas Charaoke (or Kristmas Karaoke), wrapping presents, writing Christmas cards, all of it). MOST OF ALL, I am so thankful that two of my favorite singers have re-made one of my favorite songs. 

Danke Schoen, Justin and Mariah, for saving Christmas.

       I spent this past Thanksgiving in El Paso with Ernesto, his parents and his sister, and it made me feel very lucky to be a part of their family. Naturally, I missed being at home, which reminded me of how lucky I am to have a family that I love enough to miss and that loves me enough to save me some cranberry mold leftovers for when I got back. I am indescribably thankful for Ernesto, who constantly rescues me from the towers that I build for myself.
     The past two months have had a pretty fair deal of challenges for me, for Ernesto, for my family, for our friends and for our neighbors, and throughout it all, I’ve felt so lucky to be surrounded by people with such an impressive capacity to love and to persevere. Wayne Newton sang, “Thank you for all the joy and pain,” and to that, I’d add that I’m thankful for all of the people in my life who have made the joy worth remembering and the pain worth enduring.