1. Have no idea what your thesis is
2. Open Word anyway
3. Lie about the date so your professors don’t hate you for waiting until 24 hours before the deadline to start their assignment
4. Think about what to write.
5. Check the expiration on your bread. You can’t do well in school of you die of food poisoning.
6. Think about what to write.
7. Listen to Pandora for inspiration
8. Research Michael Jackson’s life, as it is relevant to ethnicity because he deliberately broke the barriers between race!
9. Learn Michael Jackson had a skin disease that made him white.
10. Delete lengthy paragraph about MJ’s contributions to social construction of ethnicity from Word document.
11. Delete “Black or White” from works cited
12. Be determined to finish this essay in an efficient, intellectual manner. Stridently open Google to find legitimate sources that will support your thesis, which you’ll figure out later.
13. Accidentally type “oogle.com”
14. Relish in simultaneous horror and amusement.
Things I learned while writing a paper about ethnicity:
– 7,330,000 people are using a hilarious online cheating website that guarantees an affair to remember, or your money back!